My journey through fertility, genetics, and resilience
My husband and I struggled with fertility issues and multiple miscarriages. After many attempts, we underwent DNA testing.
In 2016, we sat with the professor of human genetics at UZ Leuven to prepare for the test. He had reviewed our family trees and noticed a high number of breast and ovarian cancers on my side, which raised concerns. He suggested I get tested for the BRCA mutation. I had, among others, lost my grandmother to ovarian cancer. Still, I was there for a baby, and I preferred to park that topic for later. But the professor shared a story that changed everything: a patient who had just had a baby and shortly after passed away from breast cancer. It was a heavy story, and a wake-up call. I decided to get tested for the BRCA gene mutation.
A few weeks later, we received the results:
The news hit hard, but we didn’t let it stop us. We began IVF with embryo selection, and I started BRCA monitoring—ultrasounds and mammograms every six months. My younger sister also got tested, and after all those years, it turned out over the years that all tested women on my side of the family carry this hereditary mutation.
In 2018, our son Vic was born thanks to IVF with embryo selection. It was a high-risk pregnancy, and after a few weeks in neonatology, he was finally able to come home. Two years later, we welcomed our daughter Margaux, our cherry on top.
Meanwhile, my sister and I continued our six-month checkups. At oncology, they called us “the Vandormael sisters.” In 2021, they thought they had found something. A breast biopsy followed, and then a week of waiting—the longest week of my life. I kept thinking, “There’s an 80% chance this is it.” My hand trembled as I picked up the phone. Thankfully, it was a false alarm.
In 2023, I decided to undergo a preventive double mastectomy. The recommendation was to do it before turning 40, but when my cousin, 4 years older, was diagnosed with breast cancer, she just turned 40, I chose to act sooner. That same year, my sister and mother underwent the same surgery. Reconstruction using my own tissue was the chosen path. After a 16-hour surgery, I was told I would have nearly identical breasts, with only a few scars. Unfortunately, the tissue in my left breast was rejected, and five days later I needed emergency surgery. This happens in only 5% of cases, but the tissue couldn’t be saved.
Two years and 4 surgeries later, I finally feel like myself again. To the outside world, I have a normal-looking chest, but beneath my clothes are many scars, scars I’ve learned to accept.
What did I learn from all of this? Life doesn’t follow a script. You can’t plan every moment, but you can choose how you live it. Every day is a gift, and even the hardest chapters carry lessons. They shape you. They build resilience. You discover just how much strength you truly have, and how powerful a positive mindset can be.
We all live two lives, the second begins the moment you realize you only have one.
So let go of the small stuff. Do what sets your soul on fire. Surround yourself with people you love, and live your life fully, unapologetically.
Yes, my children may one day face the same BRCA mutation. But if they do, I’ll be there, every step of the way, to guide, support, and fight alongside them.
Today, I volunteer with the BRCA+ organization, working with professionals and giving a voice to BRCA carriers. Because sharing our stories matters.
And because no one should walk this path alone.
BRCA+ Network asbl
